MY God is Not Angry.

A lot of people ask me why I lost faith with God. As a matter of fact, I didn't like a lot of things about Him. Eventually, I stopped going and wandered my way out of the Puritan life. With my father being the Reverend, it was difficult to discuss how I felt about this situation. I found it especially hard to tell him that his sermons were one of the reasons why I started losing my faith. I explained how I did not like how his sermons only talked about the negative things. When I think of faith, I think of happiness. I think you should be proud of your religion and proclaim your love to God. I do not think you should be doomed to hell and have to work your way to forgiveness. Like my father once said, "thus easy is it for God when he pleases to cast his enemies down to hell...". I don't think that is the mental image you should be giving the congregation. Over and over again, Reverand Edwards tells these innocent people that they are going to hell. Really, what did they do? Ever since the day they were born, all us Puritans would ever do is work and worship our Lord, and Mr. Edwards has the guts to tell us that God has enemies? Who in their right mind would believe that? God is supposed to love everyone and forgive them all of their sins. Even the most perfect Puritans sin daily...they just don't pay attention to it.

"The god that holds you over the pit of hell...is dreadfully provoked: his wrath towards you burns like fire; he looks upon you as worthy of nothing else, but to be cast into the fire..." This is yet another negative thing my father has informed us about. Who in the world would want a God like that? Now, I know that's not what I wanted. It is one of the main reasons why I left, actually. God died for your sins. He did it for a reason, and I really don't think he should be hatred of that. It doesn't make any sense.Why would some person die for your sins, and then hold a grudge against you? By all means, he didn't have to do it. We could be all unsaved and live life knowing we go to hell. Well, I guess you Puritans still believe you are going to hell. You should not have to work for your faith. Faith is a choice and you should not have to labor over it and worry until the day you die if you have done enough to have God MAYBE open the gates to heaven in your favor. That is no way to live a happy life.

I think God is a much more understanding and loving person than my father makes him out to be. I do not believe for one minute that he is waiting to throw us in to some pit of fire to burn in hell. I believe everyone should be welcome to heaven with open arms, and forget about every single one of their worries and doubts. God is not that type of person by any means. He is not going to heartlessy snip your thread of life and send you straight to hell because you didn't plant the right seed in the garden. That's not who He is and what He does. God is a loving person. I don't care what you Puritans think.

In my years of academic writing, I don't think I am a bad writer. I actually enjoy doing all of the research and typing something as long as it interests me. One of my biggest problems with writing for school is putting my personality into the paper. I would call myself a tunnel visioned writer.The way I write is the way the teachers taught me to write when I was young. I don't know how to go away from the boring writing papers and put more of a spice to it...if you know what I'm trying to say. When I get a major writing assignment, I don't fool around. I try to get as much information as I can before I start writing so that it is easy to put my words together. I wouldn't say I am very confident in my writing, but I know it's better than my ten year old nephew's writing.

I also have a lot of apprehensions when I write. Sometimes I feel like I am simply rambling along and not making any sense. Other times I get so bored, I just want to stop caring about it and wrap things up quickly. But I usually find a way to fight through it and finish up without it sounding like I lost interest. I try to write about things that interest me to forget that I am actually writing for school. I am not so lucky sometimes, though. Those are the times where I usually lose interest and slack off.

I am excited about the portfolio idea, but I'm not sure I completely understand it. I don't know exactly how much we will be writing, but I am one of the people that strives to get the best grade. My only worry is that I won't have enough pieces of writing to choose from. I want to make sure I can pick on,y my best pieces and not have to put in one of my not so good papers to make sure I have enough, if you understand what I'm trying to say. I don't really have any problems with it. I think it's a nice change rather than the usual final tests. I am really excited to see what is in store for this class. I am already very excited to see what we will do and how this class canbedifferent